OBJECTION!

Me: Playing Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney. Gonna try to beat most of the
Ace Attorney games this month. Objection!

Josh B: HOLD IT!! i hope you arent trying to become a lawyer by playing
these games!

Me: OBJECTION! The scenarios depicted in the Ace Attorney video game
series are fictitious and are in no way indicative of how real court cases transpire.

Me: As such, they would not be able to substitute an actual degree in law,

Me: You could say, however, that the game series is one's inspiration to
become a lawyer.

Josh B: OBJECTION!!! are you saying that now you want to become a
lawyer?

Me: OBJECTION! I never indicated anything of the sort. You are simply
making baseless conjecture.

Josh B: OVERRULED!!! on the grounds that your a douch!

Me: OBJECTION! One cannot be the judge and one of the lawyers at the
same time.

Josh B: OBJECTION!! all your objections are now diamonds! i'm on a
horse!

Me: OBJECTION! Why can't I hold all of these diamonds!?

Josh B: HOLD IT! come friend i will teach you!

Me: TAKE THAT! *Pelts you with diamonds* Ha ha! I am the winning now!

Josh B: OW WHAT THE! *throws them back* DIAMOND FIGHT!!

Me: Jean Armstrong (aka The Gay Chef): Non non! We stop all of this
silly fighting!

Josh B: ‎*pops him in the face with a diamond*

Me: Lotta Hart: *Snaps picture* Alright! Now I can be a witness in an
assault case!

Josh B: ‎....crap

Me: April May: I saw it too *Wink* *Jiggle*

Josh B: ‎*dies from laughter*

Me: Don't worry Josh! I'll be your defense attorney!

Josh B: ‎*not sure if want*

Me: In Court: Take that! If you look at the photo that Lotta took, you can
clearly see that the Flash, as he was speeding by, caught the diamond. Which leaves us with one possibility. The Flash threw it because he's homophobic!

Josh B: HOLD IT!! the flash may have threw it but that doesn't mean he's
homophobic. everyone was throwing diamonds. the chef just happened to be in the line of fire.

Me: Ah, but the chef was only hit by ONE diamond. And regardless, I
have just proven my clients innocence, ill intentions aside.

Judge: I find the defendant NOT GUILTY

*Everyone cheers*